Y&R: Family Matters

On today's The Young and the Restless, Philip and his son Chance finally met for that cup of coffee that they'd arranged to have at the start of the week. It began as awkwardly as you'd expect, with Philip clearly nervous and Chance still referring to his father rather coldly as 'Sir'.

Chance suggested they start with Philip telling him why he'd left. His father explained that it had come down to a choice between going off to find his truth or staying and living a lie. Chance asked why he couldn't have found his truth in Genoa City and Philip told him that he was gay.

If Philip expected an explosive reaction to his revelation, he didn't get one. Chance didn't seem bothered at all about finding out his father was gay, but he was perplexed as to how Philip being gay explained making his family think he was dead for twenty years. I can see where he'd be confused by that, since it's not part of your typical coming out process! I still haven't heard a reasonable explanation for why he didn't just leave and move to New York or San Francisco or anywhere else in the world.

Philip told his son that it was difficult for younger people to understand the way the world was back then, that there was a lot less acceptance and gay pride (definitely true, but we're still talking about 1989, not 1959!), and on top of all of that, he had all the expectations of his position in the Chancellor family weighing him down and was just trying to play a role, one that he could only play with the help of a lot of alcohol.

Chance said it sounded like Philip was going through a lot back then, but nothing could explain the fact that he'd had a wife and a child that he'd abandoned, that he'd run from his responsibilities. Chance wouldn't be able to live with himself if he ever did the same.

Philip said he hoped Chance was never faced with such an impossible choice himself and Chance pointed out that Philip had obviously come out to the family since his return and no one was trying to drive him out of it. How impossible a choice could it have been?

Philip agreed that they may have accepted him twenty years ago, but at the time his fear had told him they wouldn't. He'd known he could never be the husband or father his family needed, but when Chance protested that he'd never even tried, Philip said he had, in the beginning, telling Chance that he'd fed him, changed him, and held him when he cried.

Chance dismissed this by saying they'll never know how things might have turned out if Philip had stayed, and Philip FINALLY apologized to someone for his actions, telling Chance he was sorry that he'd left him, but then he quickly tried to shift blame again, saying that maybe if he'd had a mother like Chance did in Nina, things might have been different.

Chance did thank Philip for being brave enough to come back and be tested for Huntington's Disease, especially knowing all that he'd be facing by doing so. Philip said he hadn't been brave, he'd just been trying to be a father.

They wrapped up the conversation with Philip telling Chance that he didn't have to leave Genoa City if Chance wanted him to stick around. Chance didn't really respond to that, though, so Philip shook his hand and told him to let him know.

After meeting with his son, Philip went to see his mother, Jill. They talked about the meeting with Chance and Philip said that he couldn't tell if his son was burying his rage or just didn't care at all about him. Jill recalled how she used to tell herself that Philip's anger at her at least proved he'd cared.

Philip then brought up his abandoning of his son and claimed it was part of a family pattern of putting his own needs before his child's. Jill went on the defensive, pointing out that she'd sent him to boarding school for a few years, yes, but she hadn't left his life completely or let him think she was dead!

Philip said that he wasn't trying to lay blame (yeah, right), but instead wanted to begin healing their dysfunctional family, starting with forgiving her for the past and letting her know that he knew she'd been the best mother she'd been able to be. It ended up being the first real mother/son scene the two have had since Philip's return.

Meanwhile, Chance was meeting with his own mother. Nina asked how things had gone with Philip and Chance told her he'd found out the guy was gay. Nina asked how he was feeling about that and Chance said it didn't make any difference to him. Nina pointed out that Philip was still his father and Chance admitted that the only reason he'd even agreed to meet with the guy was because he thought Nina was still in love with him. Now that that wasn't the case.... The look on Nina's face, though, brought Chance up short and he asked her to confirm that she wasn't still in love with Philip.

Nina confessed that Philip had been the love of her life and even with all that she'd found out recently, he still was. Chance was clearly not pleased to hear this.

Well, I've wanted to see a scene where a parent comes out to their child on a soap for some time now, and we finally got one. Of course, the way I imagined it, the parent wouldn't have been a stranger to the child to begin with. That added a whole different dynamic to the story and still leaves another sort of parent coming out to child story to be told by some other soap.

Chance's non-reaction may mean he really isn't bothered by Philip's sexuality or it may just be a part of his overall attitude towards Philip, which is cold at best. Time will tell how okay he actually is with this piece of news.