There were two Nuke days this past week. The first was on Tuesday, which marked the much anticipated return of the beloved Colonel Winston Mayer. I don't know about you, but I've been feeling like the show really hadn't been the same since he dove to his 'death' in the murky waters of that river in New York City last year.
Ah, bitter sarcasm. I must be writing about As the World Turns again!
On Tuesday, aspiring documentary filmmaker Noah found out that he'd been denied permission to film on military bases. He shared this news with his producer/camera man/sexy boyfriend Luke, who suggested that he call up Lieutenant Hasbro, the friend of his father's that he interviewed a few weeks ago, and see if he could be of any help.
For some reason, though, Hasbro refused to take Noah's call. Luke's next suggestion was that they enlist the only other military personnel of their acquaintance: Riley Morgan. Noah was hesitant, given that Casey hates the guy and might have a problem with his friends going to Riley for help. Luke, the dear little optimist, declared that Noah could end up winning an Oscar for this film, so Casey will get over it.
The guys set off to Java to meet Riley and explained the situation to him. Riley pointed out that he was no longer in the military, that his tour was over. The guys said that he had a better chance of getting Hasbro to help Noah than they did, since he and Riley had the whole military connection in common. Riley brought up Noah's own connection with a decorated Colonel, but Noah explained that his father isn't just dead, he also disgraced the uniform.
When Noah left to take a call about some rented equipment, Luke suggested that Riley help them as a way to show Casey and Margo that he really is a good guy. That suggestion seemed to appeal to Riley and he agreed to help.
Luke and Noah went back to the Snyder house (seriously, when does this summer lease on their apartment start?! It's almost July!) to look at pictures of Noah as a kid. Luke ooohed and awwed over how cute the five year old Noah was and how happy he looked. Noah explained that he'd just opened a great Christmas gift in that photo: the rocking horse his father had made him by hand.
The guys discussed again how hard it is for Noah to reconcile the father who clearly loved him with the man who murdered his mother and tried to kill Luke, and they hoped that the film would help Noah with this.
Riley, meanwhile, showed up at Lieutenant Hasbro's office, only to find Colonel Mayer swiveling around to face him from Hasbro's chair, chomping on a big cigar and grinning like a true soap villain back from the dead.
Riley informed the Colonel that he'd met Hasbro before and knew that Mayer wasn't him. Noah's dad informed the other man in turn that he knew that he wasn't really Riley Morgan, either. Oh, my God! Who could have seen that coming? Besides anyone who has watched even a minute of Riley's storyline, I mean.
Colonel Mayer proceeded to introduce himself to Riley and tell him that if he didn't follow his orders, everyone in Oakdale would know Riley's secret.
Later, Riley showed up at Luke & Noah's and told them that Hasbro had agreed to allow Noah access to the base, but only Noah. Luke couldn't go with him, since he had no affiliation with anyone in the military. Noah protested that Luke was his camera man, so he couldn't do it without him, but Luke quickly agreed with the terms set by 'Hasbro'. After Riley left, Luke told Noah not to worry, that they'd find a way around the regulation.
Riley called the Colonel, who was watching the stolen DVD of Noah's film, and told him that he'd done what he asked. Mayer told him that if everything didn't go according to plan, he would hold Riley responsible.
Ho, hum. Honestly, even as badly written as this show is, I expected the return of the Colonel from the dead to be a bit more dramatic than this. If the story is going to be this dull, they could at least throw in some Luke & Noah kisses to distract us!
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